Monday, September 27, 2010

Another Triathlon

I am copying and pasting a portion of this from my personal blog- but I just completed my third sprint triathlon.  I never thought I could do something so physically challenging in my life.  Not just because of my headaches, but because I am just not the kind of person who is into exercise.

Last week was a tough one- Severe headaches and nausea every single day.  Extreme throbbing and pain that I just had to push through because I had commitments I didn't want to miss(I was excited and honored to be asked by my 16 year old nephew to tutor him in french- I felt horrible, but HAD TO SAY YES!  And even though I hurt, it felt good to be with my boy.).  I went for a simple walk on Friday with the baby and I felt winded.  I was in so much pain- I simply wondered how in the world was I going to manage the tri-athlon the very next day.  The pain wouldn't go away.  But I refused to panic and realized if I felt horrible I would deal with it then.  Here is what I came up with:

I have found that even though I may be carrying around extra weight and don't look or feel how I want to, that I am still capable of setting physical goals and achieving them. I have found that despite any physical pain I am in, I am able to focus and relax and enjoy the moment at hand. I have found that although it might not be very pleasant, the reward for endurance is sweet and gratifying. I simply found a strength inside of me that allows me to keep going. The power of prayer is huge, and I am grateful to have it on my side.


I think I can becomes I know I can.

My goal is now a reality.

I feel good about myself and my abilities.

Thanks to my friends and my dear sweet family for supporting me and believing in me too.

Thursday, September 23, 2010

one step forward... two steps back....

I noticed three days in a row:  no headache!

My medication takes two months to really start working- by month six, whatever changes have taken place are probably it.  So I am almost to the two month mark and have noticed a change. 

The medication for pain works on the migraines.  I don't always have migraines, so it isn't always effective.  I know I should call the doc and try something else.  But I just have a block on calling doctors.  For me anyway, not my children(I finally have surgery scheduled for the baby end of October after weeks of what felt like incessant phone calls).

The meds for sleep don't really work.  I don't get sleepy feeling, just drugged feeling.  Not so good for the next day when I still didn't get enough sleep.  Another thing to mention to the doctor.

My husband and support person has been much kinder since our last blow-out.  We had our anniversary.  We made some decision about our future. We have renewed our commitment to each other that includes more dates and counseling- which is taking a back-seat since I was working so hard on arrangements for the baby.  But at least we are on the same page.  I feel he just over-heated and had to get to his re-set button.  He has no idea how much one little phone call from work to simply ask me how I am feeling can mean to me. 

Since those three non-headache days last week my period started and I have plummeted into the black-hole of headaches.  I skipped book-club and have been in my bed every night by 9 with a heating pad and an ice pack.  Not only have I been headachy, I have been exhausted and nauseated.  I called my sister to tell her I would think I was pregnant if I wasn't on my period.  I told my other sister my periods have been getting harder lately because I am starting the journey to meno-pause.  She told me I am nuts because I am only 34.  Whatever-- right now I am having very bad thoughts as to what I would like to do to relieve this pain.  But no thought I would actually act upon.  It sucks.

On Saturday I participate in my third and final tri-athlon of the season.  I am very nervous because of my pain this week.  My sister and I tried to do a run-through on Monday and my energy was so low I couldn't do the third part: the 5K run/walk.  I will ask the good Lord for his strength to make up for my lack of strength.   After the tri I need to come home to go to my husbands company picnic, and then Sat. night we have a Broadcast to the women at church.  I will be busy... and exhausted.  I wonder if I will make it to all three events?

So... I am frustrated and in pain as I write this.  I am nervous about this weekend.  But I will do what I always do... put my shoes on... and face my life head on.

Thursday, September 9, 2010

Invisible Illness Week

National Invisible Chronic Illness Awareness Week is held annually in September and is a worldwide effort to bring together people who live with invisible chronic illness and those who love them. 
Check out:  invisibleillness.com



30 Things About My Invisible Illness You May Not Know


1. The illness I live with is: Chronic Migraine/Headache

2. I was diagnosed with it in the year: 6th Grade

3. But I had symptoms since: Around puberty

4. The biggest adjustment I’ve had to make is: taking it easy when all I want to do is ignore and keep on going.
5. Most people assume: if I am moving around and appear to be normal, I am not hurting.

6. The hardest part about mornings are: getting up before I am ready- with kids that is almost every morning

7. My favorite medical TV show is: None right now

8. A gadget I couldn’t live without is: My crock-pot- that is a gadget- right?

9. The hardest part about nights are: going to sleep- I either hurt too much to sleep, or I don't hurt and don't want to slow down long enough to sleep

10. Each day I take _10-20_ pills & vitamins. (No comments, please)

11. Regarding alternative treatments I: love it and think it works, but have a hard time keeping with it because a)it is expensive(not covered by insurance) and b) its alternative so I let it drop off my radar

12. If I had to choose between an invisible illness or visible I would choose: invisible.  I may not have life figured out, but I can fake it like the best of them... and sometimes faking it helps pull me through.

13. Regarding working and career: It was sometimes easier going off to work with pain because I had a distraction. 

14. People would be surprised to know: I have headaches that last 8-10 days- usually one or two a month.

15. The hardest thing to accept about my new reality has been: some of the people closest to me are fed up and no longer patient with me and my pain.

16. Something I never thought I could do with my illness that I did was: tri-athlons- I will participate in my third one at the end of September.

17. The commercials about my illness:  aren't really about my illness.

18. Something I really miss doing since I was diagnosed is: spontaneous adventures- who knows if I will have a headache or not.

19. It was really hard to have to give up: Needlepoint- I enjoy the detail work, but can't do it with a headache.

20. A new hobby I have taken up since my diagnosis is: Yoga- My husband got me started in yoga for relaxation before we were married in hopes it would help me.  I enjoy it and can usually do it with a headache.  My kids do it with me for about 5 minutes too. 

21. If I could have one day of feeling normal again I would: completely clean my house, play for hours with my kids in the park, and enjoy an evening alone with my  husband.

22. My illness has taught me: not many people understand, but that is OK, a lot of people still care.

23. Want to know a secret? One thing people say that gets under my skin is: give me advice that completely cured their headaches(which couldn't possibly be like mine)

24. But I love it when people: listen and actually try to understand

25. My favorite motto, scripture, quote that gets me through tough times is: I can live with pain. I can live with my headaches. I can still CARE for my FAMILY and meet my obligations. I might do it better without the pain, BUT I am capable to do it with it. And I think that is pretty darn OK.

26. When someone is diagnosed I’d like to tell them: listen to their bodies- its OK to take it easy.

27. Something that has surprised me about living with an illness is: even in great pain, I can find happiness.

28. The nicest thing someone did for me when I wasn’t feeling well was: extended understanding.  And took my kids away allowing me to not worry about them and rest.

29. I’m involved with Invisible Illness Week because: I just found out about it and am starting to get more involved in the online community that deals with headaches.

30. The fact that you read this list makes me feel: loved.